Sparrow's Corner - Music Warehouse - Metasonix TM-7 100073

The TM-7 is basically a mean, angry guitar preamp made of three vacuum tubes. Plus a feedback loop which makes the preamp unstable. There is nothing else like it. No, it does not sound like a Death By Audio pedal. No, it won't make you sound like Steve Vai. It is unsuitable for 80s nostalgia cover bands, unless they like to do industrial versions of Duran Duran. Scrotum.

The first tube is a 6AK5. It was used as an IF amplifier in military radios and suchlike. We use it as a preamp—a BAD preamp. The SCROTUM knob controls input volume--badly. No, you can't turn it fully down. This is intentional—because it interacts with the DOUBLE SCROTUM switch. Turning down SCROTUM won't silence the awful noise and oscillation. It just makes the TM-7 howl and scream at various pitches, intermodulating with your lovely sweet guitar tone. Ha ha ha. Scrotum.

Then the signal goes through ANOTHER 6AK5. The MEGA SCROTUM knob affects its gain. So, MEGA SCROTUM is basically a drive control. Scrotum.

Finally, we have a 6BN6 tube. It was used as an FM modulation detector in cheap FM radios. You're not supposed to use it for audio. But it has a neat effect....when overdriven, it sounds like a push-pull guitar amp driven deep into saturation. You can affect the saturation with the SCROTUM UP YOU ASS knob. Scrotum.

The DOUBLE SCROTUM switch inserts a FEEDBACK loop in the circuit. It's just an awful, awful thing. Stop playing with your balchinian.

The SMASH switch selects the output desired. Down, and you get the output of the second tube. Up gives the output of the third (6BN6) tube. If you want maximum saturation, flip it UP.
(If you flip both DOUBLE SCROTUM and SMASH up, you'll get even worse distortion. It pukes upon the face of the universe. It destroys the godhead. It is MOCKING you. Scrotum.)

NOTE: The TM-7 outputs are divided down, so they are more compatible with solid-state devices than our previous TX series pedals. But it might still damage some cheap-ass audio devices.

Panel art is by the mighty Dave Lovelace (umop.com), creator of the Packrat and the Retarded Animal Babies. Dave can have my baby--anytime.

The TM-7 is for the DISCIPLINED, intelligent, non-risk-averse musician. It is NOT SUITABLE for whiny little d00dz who seek the Ultimate Tone. Suck it, Dimebag fans. And stop flossing your ragged green teeth with your crotch hair. You disgust me. Scrotum! (Gee, it's fun to say "scrotum" over and over again.)

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